


One Night Romance (Rikey)

by Miss_Anne_Thrope



Category: My Chemical Romance
Genre: Heartbreak, Love, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Multi, Music, Rikey, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-17
Updated: 2015-01-17
Packaged: 2018-03-07 23:33:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,944
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3187370
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Miss_Anne_Thrope/pseuds/Miss_Anne_Thrope
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mikey Way loves Ray? how could this happen? Mikey never came off to be gay or to really even have crushes on anyone. Now his best friend seems to spark interest in him? Lately he has dreams of him being held loved and even saying he loved Ray, but does that really mean anything?   Soon Ray starts to slowly discover Mikeys hidden desires. But does he feel the same way too? that's not possible since he thought his true love was his long time girlfriend Christa...right?  Both men seem to be compelled with emotions that could make and or break them...will there friendship blossom or burn in the ashes with the dead?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One, Inner desires~

Chapter One, Inner desires~

Mikey’s P.O.V.

I was outside there was literally nothing around me, No people or buildings or cities or towns. There was an eerie silence and a very cold breeze. The wind got harder making my body grow colder. 

I had nothing on except my wife beater shirt and a pair of superman pajama bottoms. It was so cold that it pierced into my skin, pain bleed through my body and the swift wind blew in my eyes causing me to tear up. That’s when I heard a voice, a masculine male voice that sounded vaguely familiar. 

“Mikey, are you okay?” the voice said to me. It was such a familiar voice but I just couldn't put a face to it at all, “Mikey, you don’t look so good…here let me help you up and let me keep you warm.” The voice said sounding closer. 

Soon I felt hands on both of my waist and someone lifting me up, The next thing I knew I was being held tightly by someone. My face was buried in there chest and I started to feel comfortable and warm, I felt like I was happy? 

I looked up at the person and saw their face but only briefly as I closed my eyes enjoying the love and the warmth of their body.

That’s when I heard my alarm clock go off. Groggy, I got out of bed, hit the clock that read 8:00 in the morning and looked around. I completely forgot that I was in a hotel for the rest of the week because of the tour we were currently on.

 

I was trapped in my thoughts, the dream I remember having was so weird, like I said I remember having it but I don’t remember who was in it or why I felt so comfortable around them. Honestly I have been having that same dream since…shit I don’t remember the first time I had the dream, it’s been happening for a while now…I simply just forgot…

I wiped my eyes strange enough I was tearing up…was I crying? In my sleep? Weird…I haven’t cried in my sleep since high school.

I walked into the hotels kitchen and saw a note on the counter; I picked it up and read it slowly. It was from Ray:

“Mikey, I went with Gerard, Bob and Frank to the stadium to help set up for the concert. I hope you don’t mind, I was going to wake you up but you looked tired and I was worried about you and let you sleep… We will be back tonight promise. ~Ray

Great, I’m going to be alone for a while with my thoughts. That’s just amazing, honestly I rather them waking me up than leaving me here alone, with nothing to do except sit here. I thought about them taking Bob, and how close Bob and Ray were, and honestly I felt jealous…I don’t even understand why.

~

I walked around the big hotel room, first going into Gerard and Frank’s room and looking around, next to Bob’s room, then in mine and Ray’s room. I also completely forgot we shared a room which was strange. I’ll usually remember things like that.

The room had two twin sized bed on each of its sides, there was three doors in the room, one leading into the bathroom, another leading into the walk in closet and the last one leading to the balcony.

I walked out on the balcony and looked out into the beautiful terrace and smiled. I remember last night me and Ray sat out here drinking beers and talked basically all night, although he was a little skeptical about the balcony at first, he eventually came out here and we talked for hours;

 

Flashback~~

“Ray, come on it’s just a balcony…not the fucking fall to your death”

 

“Mikey! We’re fucking thirteen floors up! What if we do fall or something???”

 

“RAY! Come on were not going to fall!”

 

“Mikey…I’m doing this for you…BUT I SWEAR TO GOD if we fall I will kill you…”

 

“Ha-ha whatever!”

…

“Mikey, how did we all become so apart?”

 

“What do you mean? Within the band or like…us …”

 

“Both…what happened?”

 

“Honestly I don’t know we all just got so cold towards each other…”

 

“Maybe we need a break off of touring? You know with our families…”

 

“Ray, a break off of tour to see our families won’t help...you guys are basically my family…”

 

*Ray gets up and hugs me tightly, I Blushes hard* “You really mean that Mikey?”

 

“YES! Yes Ray ha-ha…I mean that…um now can we go inside…Its getting kind of windy and cold out here…”

 

*opens door and smiles* “I’ll keep you warm Mikey”

 

*I blushed harder and my heart pounded faster*


	2. Jealousy

Chapter Two, Jealousy~

Ray’s P.O.V~

-Earlier that morning-

I woke up to the sound of knocking on me and Mikey’s bedroom door. “Come in!” I said in a tired voice.

Gerard appeared from the open door, he looked tired but not in any type of distress he had on his silly skeleton pajamas which were weird saying it was almost seventy degrees inside here today. 

“Ray! Get up, come on we have to go do a mic check today, wake up Mikey and let’s go!” I heard him say loudly.

I put the pillow over my face; I wasn’t in the mood for Gerard’s mouth today I didn’t originally go to bed till three in the morning so I was extremely exhausted! BESIDE, we didn't have a Vocals and instrumental check today…we did one yesterday and we don’t have to go on stage for another forty eight hours, today was supposed to be our chill day. WHAT in the hell promoted him to want to go on the extra to do this shit?

“RAAAAYYY come on! Let’s go!!! MSI is going to be there and they’re going to help us get ready COOOOMMMEEE ONNN!!!” he said throwing pillows and pulling my blanket.

I see…Lindsey…the bassist for Mindless Self Indulgence wow Gerard just wow!

“Really Gerard? Fine I’m getting up just…just leave me alone for a second alright?” I said a little aggravated.

“Geez Ray…someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed…don’t have to get all ill-mannered on me bro, just trying to wake you up gosh…When you get done with…that little mood swing you got going on there, you make your way out here for some cereal…and make sure you leave…that… inside here” he said with a little hand motion and closing the door.

I rolled my eyes and thought to myself; wow I swear we all get more hopeless every day when we get involved with a new person…every single day.

I got out of bed and fluffed up my fro, I began to walk over to Mikey ready to wake him up but then I saw the horrible bags under his eyes.

He really hasn’t got much sleep lately from the things he has told me last night, and I would hate to disturb him,so I left him alone.

I quickly took a shower and threw on some clothes before running out into the hall.

“Where is Mikey?” Gerard asked me when I made it into the living room. Gerard was finally out of those stupid pajamas and into some real clothes.

I turned from his disconcerting face and whispered 

“He is still sleeping…I didn't want to wake him because he hasn't got much sleep in days Gerard and he looked so peaceful, can we just leave him?” 

Gerard shook his head, but Frank stepped in “Gerard please let’s just leave him, we can handle it on our own anyway”

Gerard finally said yes and went downstairs with me Frankie and Bob towards the bus...

We all filed in slowly and Gee sat in the driver seat, I looked outside the window back towards the hotel worried about leaving Mikey but knowing it was the right thing to do. 

I mean damn he is a grown man! Why do I even care anyway? It’s like over the past few days he has become my top concern. 

And Honestly I am worry about him even more than I worry about anyone else in the band; I worry about him twenty-four hours of a day which is strange…

…I mean it’s not like I love him or anything…right…

~

The bus stopped at the stadium where we are performing tonight, when we got out Lindsey greeted us 

She walked over towards Gerard and kissed his cheek.

I rolled my eyes, it’s not that I don’t like her, I love Lindsey…it’s just…I really didn’t want to wake up at six in the morning for an unscheduled check when the only amount of sleep I got was two or three hours.

She walked over to me and kissed my cheek then over to Bob and Frank, “Alright come on lets go” she said smiling...”WAIT? OH wait there is something missing…um where is Mikey?” She continued. 

Did she not notice Mikey missing when we first got off the damn bus? Like honestly how can anyone forget Mikey? I understand everyone forgetting me but Mikey? That’s unheard of! 

“He’s kind of sick so he stayed in today Lynz” I said out in a sheepish tone, Gerard turned to me and eyed me with an evil eye.

“Oh…okay…well…If you need a bassist player today…I’ll…play for you…just for you can practice you know” She said in a sweet voice, while twirling her hair.

Frank and I started to shake our heads no but then we heard Gerard say “Great, that will be wonderful…”

He then turned to me and said in a shaky voice “I hope Mikey will get better soon” and walked with Lynz inside.

I rolled my eyes and looked at Frank, who I don’t think even likes Lindsey, and I followed them inside. 

How could Gerard replace Mikey? I mean yeah it’s only going to be for a day but still…it still bothers me a lot…

~

I sat on the edge on the stage tired, my eyes were heavy and my body limp but I couldn’t go to sleep at all. What was wrong with me? 

I mean I can’t go to sleep at all…maybe I’m just worrying too much. 

I looked around for everyone, Frank was out back calling Jamia, Bob is chilling out with MSI, and of course Gerard was with Lindsey…so right now will be perfect for a nap, whatever…

My mind shifted to Mikey, Mikey…why him why now? I wonder what he’s doing right now, if he is lonely having to stay at the hotel by himself. I missed him; I honestly did even though it’s only been 8 hours. I missed his beautiful poker face and his logical rewording. I mean yeah like I said I love Lindsey I promise you I do, but to me she will never be like Mikey.

“Ray Wake up lets go” I perceived from Bob’s whisper. 

I sat up from the hard stage flooring and jumped down from it, hmm I really did go to sleep?


	3. Realization

**Mikey’s POV~ (Hours later)**

Have you ever felt lonely, not lonely like you don’t have friends or family around but lonely like in I don’t know intimacy or love. Because that’s how I feel right now, like I need some major intimacy in my life…I mean of course I have many girls practically throwing themselves at me every tour me and the band go on and there are some potential ones that could vary to suit my interest…But…it’s like I want something different, something more untraditional and just diversity…I just need a new spark, one new spark.

 

I exhaled softly, sitting on the living room couch and turned on the TV, flipping through the movie channels and looking for something that won’t be painfully stupid to watch.

I finally go to Family Guy…Family Guy really isn't to painfully stupid so I stayed on that channel and laid on the couch, crossing my arms around my chest and  feeling my eyes get heavy and tired. I wasn’t tired when I lay down; it was only three in the afternoon so I don’t know why I was tired now…

 

_I woke up on a hard floor in a tiny  closed white room, there was nothing around me or anything just like last time…except this time I noticed a big black shadow sitting in the corner of the room._

_I tried to get up to see what it was and why it was in the corner but I couldn’t move at all. My body was tense and stiff, and I couldn’t feel my legs._

_I wriggled for movement, but my struggle was soon stopped when I heard someone call my name in anguish. “Mikey…Mikey help me please…” I noticed that it was coming from the big black shadow; I tried to move closer towards it, trying to see who it was and why they needed help but I couldn’t move at all._

_The shadow’s cry for help got louder and it became evident that it was a memorable voice of a colleague…”_

_Mikey help me…I need you to help please Mikey!!” soon I started to notice the voice even more and it became more and more familiar…was it…Ray?_

_”R-Ray…Ray is that…you?” I shouted out toward him still trying to move._

_“I’m coming Ray, I’m coming for you, I’m coming to help you…” I said feeling a little bit of progress but still not making it anywhere._

_Soon I gave up…I gave up on going to Ray “I’m so sorry Ray!” I said crying a little bit “Mikey why didn’t you save me? WHY DIDN’T YOU COME TO MY RESCUE LIKE YOU PROMISED YOU WOULD MIKEY!!! Don’t you love me don’t you want me to be happy?” He said before disappearing into the shadows._

_I cried harder, “I do love you Ray…I do…I have always love you ,“how could he say that? OF COURSE I LOVED HIM! I mean he is my… he’s my friend... how could he even think that I didn’t love him, that I didn’t care about him and what was he talking about rescuing him? What promise I closed my wet eyes and just lay on the floor…when I felt a hand on my shoulder blade._

_I opened my eyes and saw Ray stand above me with one hand on my shoulder and the other in front of my face. “Here let me help you up…” he whispered, grabbing my hand that now lay limp in his tough hand. He jerked me up and beamed at me with a smile that melted my heart._

_He took his finger and wiped my tears away, “Why are you crying Mikey, don’t cry because when you cry…you make me want to cry…” he hugged me securely as if he didn't want to let me go or lose me, as if he loved me…more than a friend…and the weird part was I was enjoying it. I enjoyed him holding me tightly and making me feel like this…I buried my head into his chest and smiled._


	4. Chapter Four, Strange feels under the moon light~

Chapter Four, Strange feels under the moon light~

Ray POV~

We walked into the hotel room and saw Mikey lying on the couch asleep. I sat next to him on the couch and looked at him; I wonder what he was dreaming.

“Ray, stop creeping on Mikey and wake him up for we can go get something to eat” I heard Gerard say to me.

I rolled my eyes and put a hand on his shoulder prepared to wake him when I heard him murmur in a low sleepy daze “I do love you Ray…I do…I have always loved you”

Surprised I jumped off the couch, backed away and looked at him, he was still sleeping soundlessly, unaware or ignorant to his sleep talking. I felt my cheeks blow up with a shade of inflamed red…Did he really say he loved me?

“Ray man what’s wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost or something…” Frank said. I turned to him and saw both him and Bob looking at my befuddled expression.

What? Did he not had heard what Mikey just said? Mikey just told me he loved me…I mean yeah self-consciously but still I’m sure it counts.

I looked back down to him and could have sworn I saw tears roll down his cheek…was he crying in his sleep? Was he having some kind of weird nightmare where he was dreaming about me and should I be creep out that he said that? I mean even if he didn't mean it or something, he still said it…but I’m not at all weirded out, honestly I’m more ecstatic than I should be, which is strange…does that make me…gay that I actually am happy he said that?

“Ray!” bob yelled snapping me out of thought “Are you okay?”

I nodded my head and replied in an unstable voice “Y-Yes…I was just…thinking…you know…in T-Thought he-he”

Both Frank and Bob observed me with a bizarre glare that made my spine cringe. “What?” I said shrugging my shoulders.

They turned to each other and smirked a little before busting into a petty laugh. “WHAT!?!” I said again

They shook their heads and just continued laughing, getting up and running to Gerard who was in the kitchen, and whispered something to him.

He looked up at me and laughed too before sending Frank and Bob away and coming sluggishly to me.

“Ray, what’s up with you? I mean you have been acting a little strange ever since this morning…” He said looking at me and sitting me down on the floor because we both didn't want to disturb Mikey.

“What do you mean Gerard?” I mean seriously what did he mean? I wasn't acting strange... was I?

“Ray you know what I mean…You have been having mood swings, you been trying to sleep in late, been trapped in thought more frequently and you haven’t eaten all day…Frank suggested that you were pregnant…” he said barely containing laughter.

I punched him in his stomach hard with a lot of force, “DAMN RAY!” Gerard said in agony clutching his belly tightly.

“I’m not pregnant idiot!” I said after I stood up and contended into my room, closing the door and laying on my bed.

I heard a knock at my door and looked up. “RAY! Come on let me in let’s talk” Gerard said from beyond the doors barriers.

I sighed and stood up slowly, walking to the door and opening it, Gerard stood there propped up by the frame of the door. “Bout time…” he said before coming in all confidently and sitting on my bed.

“Now…Ray let’s talk …what’s on your mind?” He continued.

I rolled my eyes, I mean there is nothing on my mind at all, like seriously the only thing I was thinking about was finally getting some well-deserved sleep, and…Mikey…kinda, I’m still trying to wonder if he really said that to me or was t my mind playing tricks on me…and if it was my mind playing with my emotions, why would it play with Mikey? I mean what, is my secret deep desire to be with Mikey? Would it be bad if it was…OH GOD why do I even feel this way right now? ACTUALLY I don’t know how I feel anymore…I mean I’m starting to think that all these things are starting to symbolize that I may be having….

”RAY...” Gerard snarled at me in a hissy tone “…DUDE THIS IS WHAT I MEAN!!! You have just been randomly like spacing out when we talk to you…and it’s not just been happening today, but it’s been happening for days” he continued

I glared at him, he couldn't possibly right…Days? Really? “Gerard, has it really been days, have I literally been spacing out like this for…days?” I whispered in shock.

“Uh YEAH bro! ever since the day you talked to Mikey alone on the tour bus because he was feeling down about something I forgot…It’s like after that you have become more moody and tired, are you having bad dreams, are you feeling isolated or something Raymond?”

“I’m fine Gee, I just I don’t know I just really don’t want to talk okay.” I said getting annoyed.

he gave me a foolish and derpy smile and said “WHO DA DADDY!”

I smiled and said “What?” he laughed, stood up and went to the door “WHO IMPREGNANTED MA BABY!”

I smiled “Get out and stop being imprudent!”

He laughed and opened the door, leaving me alone.

I went back over to the bed and closed my eyes; my hair was tickling the skin around my face. Did I really like Mikey? I mean all my life I was straight, well I thought I was…and when I met Mikey, he did send a ray of sunshine towards me but…likening him preposterous…right?


	5. Weird Dreams? Talk to Gerard...

Chapter Five, Weird Dreams? Talk to Gerard…

Mikey’s POV~

I woke up to the smell of Chinese food in the kitchen…Of course Gerard ordered out, he’s too lazy to cook and we defiantly aren't going with Franks “It’s not burnt, its Cajun” Idea…uh no…

I sat up and looked around the hotel living room, it was quiet in the living room…But I could tell that both Frank and Bob were playing Xbox from the screaming and the brawling yells in the back room. 

I stood up and looked around, the Chinese food boxes laid on the counter open…I looked at it and thought about making me some but then I decided that I wasn't hungry at all.

I heard a room door open and looked down the hallway; Ray stumbled out of the room half sleep. When he walked in the kitchen and saw me, he slowly backed away looking at me with wide eyes, And then he walked passed me and over to the food, Confused, I waved at him and smiled a little smile, why did he look like I did something wrong…Did I do something wrong, oh god I hope I didn't do something wrong…

That’s when I remember the dream I had about him like only a few seconds ago…MY GOD! I felt my face grow blood-shot, was he mad because of my dream? WAIT, that doesn't make sense since he isn't in my mind, so he couldn't have saw my dream…so why is he acting so funny.

“Ray, are you okay? You look like you’re a little anxious or jittery…” I asked.

He jumped up and said “N-No reason…I’m just tired you know, exhausted um ready for bed that’s all.” He turned away from me again and I could see the red that slowly crept on face. Was he embarrassed, Embarrassed to be around me? I don’t understand why, I mean what did I do that was so embarrassing?

He quickly grabbed plate of Lo Mein and ran to his room not looking at me. “See ya Mikey!” he said before closing the door.

My face washed with complete gloom; maybe he was in my dreams watching me want him? Wow, I sat on the couch thinking and wondering to my self why I even had that crazy dream. Why did I even want him to hold me and love me, why is he in my dreams so often lately, I can’t be starting to fall for him can I? I mean were friends…FRIENDS! Like honestly, oh god maybe I should go talk to Gerard about this, I mean he knows more on the subject of love than I do anyway…right…

~

I walked into Gerard’s room slowly, he was on the phone with of course Lindsey. MY GOD WHY DON’T THEY JUST GET MARRIED TO EACH OTHER, like they spend every god blessed hour together Jesus Christ.

“Psst! Gerard PSST! Gerard” I said not trying to make a scene with him on the phone. He looked at me with a face that read “What do you want I’m busy” I walked over to his bed and sat next to him.

“Mind sharing some brotherly wisdom about falling in love big bro?” I whispered quietly.

His eyes grew big as he said on the phone “Lindsey I have to go, Mikey wants to talk about love…ha-ha I know okay bye baby.” He then turned to my disconcerted face and said “SOO…love hmm interesting, talk on baby bro!”

I rolled my eyes and said “THANKS FOR TELLING LINDSEY BRO! But uh anyway…yeah I think I’m in love with someone but I’m not sure so I’m coming to you for help…”

He grabbed both of my hands and brought me into a tight hug. “Awe, you’re growing up baby bro!” He said smiling

“You do know I was in love before…it’s just this time, it feels different. You know like it’s just…different.” I said rolling my eyes and pulling back from him.

He looked at me, his jumbled hazel eyes staring at me, “Different, how? How is it different than any other girl you have loved?”

“Oh well the girls I loved weren't like, my best friends…and they were GIRLS!” I put my head into my hands and looked down.

I could tell Gerard was either excited or confused because the way he shuffled on the bed. “REALLY? A guy right and a best friend? Who is it?”

I raised my head up “NO NO NO! I will NOT tell you! You have a really big mouth Gerard NO NO NO!” I yelled.

He put a hand on my shoulder and said “He’s in the band right? Of course he is…It’s Bob isn’t it…NO! Wait…Can’t be Frankie right; hmm OH IT HAS TO BE RAY! It’s Ray right, don’t lie it’s so Ray.”

My face flushed as he mentions the name, “GERARD!” I yelled

He smiled and said “OOO its Ray, You should tell hi-“

I slapped him really hard “NO! I will kill you if you mention ANYTHING to him! Do you understand! Besides…I don’t even know if I really do like him or it’s just a thing.”

Gerard rubbed his face where I slapped him,” OKAY…tell me why do you think that you might like him?” He said now in a stern voice.

“WELL…Lately I have been having dreams and day dreams of him holding me and making me feel really comfortable. Also in the dreams I always cry, like he never does anything wrong, it’s always me who does something wrong because in my dream he goes on about a promise I made him and that I broke it that I don’t love him. BUT I DO LOVE HIM, I-it’s weird, And also I grow jealous of him and Bob all the time because they hang out constantly and it pisses me off so bad and I swear I wish me and him hung out like that but we don’t anymore and it’s just UGH!” I said looking away.

Gerard bit his lip to restrain him from either laughing or saying something stupid that could get me to slap him.

“Gee, say something!” I boosted, pushing him hard

His face grew hysterical, as he opened his mouth “Mikey…you and Ray are going to be cute together awe!!!”

I slapped him again “NO! We aren't going to be together…because I could have sworn I didn’t like him and he is avoiding me…I don’t know why”

“Well duh because he likes you too! Awe” He said

“No he doesn’t!” I shouted my face was redder than a tomato now.

Gerard got off of his bed and looked me in the eye, “Michael James Way, I known you for quite some time now and I know when you like someone…I known forever that you loved Ray, since the day you bought him a pack a cupcakes from the ‘kindness of your heart’ BULL CRAP. You do like him and I’mma prove it!” He went to the door and opened it.

“Ge-Gerard what are you- GERARD WHERE ARE YOU GOING! GERARD!!!” I screamed as I got up following him out the door.

“OH Raymond Toro, come here please!” He screamed down the hall.

“GERARD!!!” I screamed

“Just chill brother I got you! Just trust me” He whispered to me before calling Ray’s name again.

Ray came out of his room; he just took a shower because I could smell the soaps fragrance bounce off of his skin and over where I was. When he saw me he backed away, then he turned away from me and looked at Gerard.

“Y-Yes?” he said quietly.

“Ray, tomorrow, can you please help Michael here tune his bass guitar...he doesn't know how to really do it good and we have a show tomorrow.” Gerard said

What was Gerard planning? I know how to tune a guitar and I’m sure Ray knows I know…well I know how to tune MY bass guitar so! Beside if I did need my guitar tuned; I wouldn't ask Ray…he will be too busy with the concert stuff.

Ray looked at me and then back a Gerard, “Uhm…can Frank teach him? And doesn't he know how?”

Gerard walked over to Ray and smiled “AH little Mikey can’t tune a guitar! Where have you been all your life Jesus…and Frankie can’t because he doesn't know how to tune a BASS guitar…So yeah can you teach Michael?”

Ray rolled his eyes and said “FINE, I’ll teach him tomorrow.” He walked back into the room and closed the door.

I grabbed Gerard’s arm and pulled him over to the side. “GERARD WHAT THE FUCK!” I kinda yelled and covered my mouth.

“What, I didn't tell him…I just gave you guys a date, you know push the romance a little. “ He said smiling.

“WHAT ROMANCE!!! There is no romance, YOU'RE NOT CUPID YOU KNOW!” I whispered.

“On the contrary I very much well am!” He said before going back to his and Frank’s room closing the door.

I sighed, walking to the bathroom in the living room and taking a long shower. Then I walked slowly to me and Ray’s room, opening the door and looking around, seeing him sleep soundlessly made me less nervous about sleeping in the room.

I sighed and threw on my new snoopy pajama pants and an oversized white tee shirt. I took one more look at Ray and smiled; he really was very cute when he sleeps…it made my heart flutter.


	6. Early Morning Blues

Ray’s POV~

Early Morning Blues

Chapter Six

 

I woke up with a hint of sunshine peeking through the balcony door. Sitting up, I looked at the alarm clock and saw that it was only 9:00 am. I turned to Mikey’s bed and looked for him, but he was gone. Did he even sleep in the room last night? Oh god! I have been acting strange around him, so it’s no wonder he didn't sleep in here.

I got out of the bed to the smell of pancakes, walking down the hall and shaking out my fro, I looked around for the smell.

When I got to the kitchen, I saw Gerard flipping pancakes and the rest of them washing and putting away plates. I didn't know Gerard could cook?

“GOOD MORNING MY LITTLE RAY OF SUNSHINE! Here I made you some pancakes, we know how much you love them” Gerard said in a sarcastic sassy tone.

I looked down at the plate in disgust, I wasn't hungry AT ALL. “I’m not hungry but thanks though” I said pushing the plate away. 

Everyone turned to me as if I said something crazy or shocking….

“Ray…did you just say…you weren't hungry…what about cupcakes...I bought you some” Bob said confused

“Yeah…I’m not hungry I don’t want anything no pancakes...No cupcakes...nothing at all!” I said closing my eyes and shaking my head. 

Everyone gasped, Frank almost dropped a plate.

Gerard went up to me and pulled me aside, “Ray are you okay? You haven’t eaten yesterday at all and you haven’t eaten to day…are you sick?” he asked

“Not sick, just not hungry god Gerard!” I replied

“RAY are you stressed, you look tired and depressed, you haven’t looked like this in a week or two Ray are you okay?” he said with a motherly concerning voice.

I sighed; actually I was stressed, just like last time, a few weeks ago. I was stressing over self-esteem issues and being loved or respected. No one knows I struggle like this…no one except Mikey…the only one I feel comfortable with;

 

~Flashback~ (2 weeks ago) ~

“Ray, what’s wrong? You haven’t been smiling”

“I do smile Mikey, see *Smiles big* I just got early morning blues you know.”

“Ray…”

“Okay fine…I feel like I’m underestimated or un loved. I don’t feel like I’m loved at all Mikey by anyone anymore.

“Ray that’s crazy talk! We all love you! OUR fans love you, Gerard and Frank loves you, Bob loves you…”

“What about you?”

“Yes Ray I love you too! I love you more than I should honestly…and I will always love you”

“Promise?”

“Yes, yes I promise…you are amazing, nice, smart and talented…you are also handsome so perky up my friend I hate seeing you so sad.”

*hugs him tightly*

“RAY! You’re doing it, your blanking out again “Gee said snapping me out of my thoughts once again.

“OH I’m sorry, I-I was just thinking…” I said looking to the ground blushing and trying to shake the distant memory out of my head.

“That’s the problem, what do you even think about?” he asked

I mumbled under my breath quietly “Mikey”

“What?” he said moving in closer to hear me better.

“Mi-YOU KNOW, JUST FORGET IT! I’M GOING TO MY ROOM!!! CALL ME WHEN YOU ARE READY TO LEAVE DAMMIT.” I yelled.

Everyone’s eyes were on me like I have gone insane. I rolled my eyes and went to my room, slamming the door hard.


	7. Childish~

Mikey’s POV

I sat on the couch checking my email for any concert updates. We had to go in less than three hours and I’ll hate it if they cancelled the concert before we got there.

The hotel was really quiet; Bob went out for a bit, Gerard and Frankie were getting ready for the concert and Ray, Ray was still locked in our room where he’s been all day, well since he yelled at Gerard anyway.

I wanted to go in there and see what’s up with him, but I couldn't I was literally afraid that he might yell or get mad at me like he did Gerard. And if he did then that would absolutely kill me…So I rather sit here in complete confusion than get hurt by the one…I lo-yeah…

A few minutes later after checking my email, Gerard came out of his room and sat next to me on the couch. “Hey, any new updates on anything?” He said, turning at me and smiling. I nodded “Everything’s all set for tonight, the show is sold completely out so we’re expecting a full house.”

He smiled and whispered “Sold out? Really…wow that’s like over 2000 seats I’m excited…” H then scooted away from me and said “Mikey…You should go talk to Ray; he seems to be a little…erhm… miserable and very dejected from the group.”

I stood up quickly in protest, “GERARD! No why me? Why not you? You go talk to him not me! It’s already awkward around him now that I think…” I slowly sat back down and began to whisper, “I might you know…like him.”

Gerard smiled, he put his hand on my shoulder, and he stood up slowly calling Frank into the living room.

“Frankie go to the car, we’re going shopping…” Gerard said with a smile.

Frank looked at him confused “What? But the concert starts in less than an-“Gerard gave him a death look that meant shut up and walk. Frank looked down to the ground and said in a low voice “Fine!” he walked out of the hotel room and closed the door.

“There you go Mikey, no ones in the house…it’s quiet and you guys will be alone for an hour, so stop being so childish and enjoy will ya!” He turned around on his heel and ran for the door.

I looked at him pissed and shouted to the top of my lungs “GERARD YOU ARE TRULY MALICIOUS!!! WE AREN'T BROTHERS ANYMORE!”

“Bye Mikey” he said with a smiled and a little wink before leaving.

~~

16 minutes after Gerard left, I thought that maybe he was right and I should confront my demons head on so I gained the confidence to go talk to Ray like two adults.

I slowly walked up to my...our room door and put my hand around the knob, and sluggishly opened it, Ray laid in his bed reading…which was strange since Ray hates to read.

When I came through, he looked at me with wide eyes and sat up quickly. “Hey Mikey, uh what are you doing in here?” He said trying to hide his face.

I sat next to him on his bed; he moved over a little and gave me a fake smile.

“Ray…This is my room too…but that’s not why I’m in here…I want to talk to you…I want to tell you something…”

“Yeah…?”

He gave me an iffy but concerning look then he moved closer to me He looked deep into my eyes as if he was expecting me to say what I was going to say, my heart began to flutter and I felt lightheaded and dizzy.

“I-I wanted to tell you…” I felt my lungs collapse in my chest and the nervous that poured out faster than Niagara’s falls. God was I having a panic attack; I looked away from him quickly.

I could tell he grew impatient with waiting and didn’t notice my difficulty of breathing because he moved even closer to me so close that our skin met contact and the areas that touched burned with sensation.

“Tell me Mikey, I’m here with you and you know you can tell me anything” he said, moving his face closer to mine so that he was sure I could see him.

I wanted to kiss him so bad, the urge was completely unbearable. Our lips were so close yet my mind was so far away that I may have forgot to kiss him. His eyes danced with erotic stories of me and him and it made me even more nervous, even more on edge that I started to shake…I started to shake from nervous.

Ray put his hands on my shoulders slowly to calm me down, “Mikey calm down, you don’t have to tell me it’s okay, okay.”

I shook my head, it wasn’t okay…it wasn’t okay at all.

He smiled at me and said in an sweet voice “Here let me get you some water”

“Wait Ray!” he was about to move away when I lurched forward and kissed him hard on the lips, his expression was shocked, baffled and even a little angry maybe but he didn’t pull away no actually he kissed me deeper and hard, slowly pushing me down on his bed. I put my arms around his neck and went deeper just like he did. It was amazing, and yet very overwhelming. Did he want to kiss me as much as I wanted to kiss him? He had to right?

Ray sat basically on top of me and put his hand under my shirt, around my waist. I moaned to the sudden warmness touching my fragile cold skin, he was trying going in deeper, sticking his tongue past the very barrier of my lips but stopped to the sound of his cell phone ringing.

He lifted from me slowly, not stopping from looking into my eyes until he got to the phone. He was breathing heavy from the excitement and probably the eagerness. I sat up quickly as he answered his phone.

“H-Hello?” He said still out of breath

“OH Christa, hey um…hey baby um hey…no this is a PERFECT time to call” he said looking at me before leaving the room.

I watched him leave the room and I stood up still kinda disorganized from the kiss. “Dammit Christa” I shouted before jumping on my bed and burying my face in to my pillows.

How can I like a man in a relationship and expect him to come to me? god I’m so stupid for falling in love with a taken man.

I crossed my arms around my chest and laid on my back, angry at Christa, angry at Ray, but most importantly angry at myself. I slowly went to sleep.


End file.
